give me some films to watch. good ones, obviously. i'm not big on sports films, but if it's good, i'll watch it.

Why did you join this site?
It was 2004 and I was obsessed with inuyasha. i was infatuated with the fandom and playing around with fanfiction and, strangely enough, had begun to pick up a pencil and draw the characters i so loved. after googling images and coming to this site time and time again, i created an account. that account was not this one. out of embarrassment, i'm not going to tell you the old account.

What does your username have to do with you? Is it a combination of your favorite things, or a character of yours?
well, i had experimented with japanese-sounding names, but was beginning to think that maybe i didn't want to be tied down to something that pinpointed my hobbies. it felt a little to naked to me. "aesthetic" having been one of my favorite words since that fateful day in 9th grade health class, and just having had a conversation on (ha) the aesthetics of irony, i put it together. personally, i think it was one of my finer moments. i'm still rather proud of it.

What is your current icon of?
two of my (many) favorite colors. i call it dark alley blue and alexis yellow. i had an obsession with clouds a while back, and was sick of my panic at the disco themed icon. i can't stand it, and i've been meaning to change it for a while now.

How many watchers do you have and how many people are you currently watching?
She watches 143 people, while 80 people watch her.

only about 15 of those people are active, though.

Do you have more than one account?
yeah, several. my old account, this one, a club, and a secret account.

Name 3 of your favorite artists on DA.

(not including people i know irl)

that's 5 yeah, but whatever. there are a lotlotlotlot more, but i just don't have time to write them all out.

What deviant do you admire because of their personality?
those lovely ladies up there. and all of my friends on here, because i've made too many to count. honestly, there are just so many people who've been kind, who've given me advice, who've become my friends.

i would write down names, but i don't want to offend anyone by NOT writing them up here. if i know you, and i comment on your journals, chances are you are one of them.

How many people on here do you actually know in reality? Post their avatars.

(who i actually DON'T know in real life, but i've known him so long that i don't really think that matters anymore) :iconllwelyn-apollo:


Do you comment, fave, or both?
i fave things that i really, really love. i mean really. most of the time, i'll comment if i fave, or if i just really like something. i don't usually comment if the person has more than 5 pages of comments, unless it's something that i really want to say, because i figure most people have already said it. i also don't usually comment if the person NEVER comments back. if they just usually don't, i still will, but if they never do, i feel like they don't read the comments or just don't care.

What do you typically post on deviantart?
crap? um, a lot of shit anime, a lot of shit poetry. ...yeah. fanart. i'm a luser like that.

Do you participate in clubs or contests here on DA?
i participate in a few clubs, and i'm currently participating in one contest, but that's about it. not a lot.

What is your most popular deviation?


and


What's your favorite submission in your favorites gallery?

i couldn't possibly pick. there's no way at all. i don't have a heavy hand when it comes to favorites, so i really, really like something when i favorite it. my most recent favorite, however, is:

What are the things you wish you could draw better?
everything? i'm currently in a slump and very unhappy with my style.

Are you a subscriber?
yes, but it will be running out in a month and a half, wink wink nudge nudge.

How many hours a day do you spend on DA?
er... several. it's my homepage, so i'm on it pretty much every day. i'll usually end up only planning on being here for a few minutes, but then i get distracted. it takes up probably 30-40% of my internet time.

Are you a fast, slow, or medium typer?
fairly fast. i always use the capslock key, so that slows me down (but when's the last time you guys have seen me type a capital letter?) i average about 60-65 wpm.

What is your favorite emoticon?


it used to be but then they changed it, and i was sad. that's not counting plz accounts and unofficial emotes.

What is the most annoying thing people ask you?
i don't really get asked a lot of questions.

What is the most annoying comment you get?
i don't really get a lot of comments, either. usually someone saying something i know to be false. i'm a know-it-all, and have the research to back it up. *bitchbitchbitch*

What inspires you?
life, music, people, romance, pretty princesses, like any fandom ever, really fucked up situations, the mafia

Do you use any traditional media?
yeah. i loves me some watercolor.
for some reason, i just think it's EASIER than digital.


Do you associate people online with their icons?
if i don't already know what they look like, yes.

Have you ever suggested a Daily Deviation?
only once or twice.

Everyone has considered leaving DA once or twice. Have you? Why?
not really, no. i like it too much. i have too many friends. i loves the pretty artses, and i like the community well enough. and i'm way, way too vain. although, i see why many people do leave it, i personally, would be sad to see it go.

i tag jeromy! muahaha!

i keep trying to properly explain what i am, but it's only giving me a headache and making me realize terrible, terrible things.

so instead, i will tell you about my art.

i have been doing a lot of it, and i have a bunch of pieces that i want to put on dA. the only problem is that my scanner only works with my desktop, and i don't have a mouse. i have, however, ordered a tablet, so hopefully that won't be much of a problem soon. unless i can't download the drivers because i don't have a mouse. i need to bite the bullet and buy one, but that's literally the only reason i need one.

and you know what? i miss the people who GET ME. the people who get where i'm coming from and the things that i've done and why i've done them. the only problem is that they are far away, and in more senses than one.

and i miss my boyfriend, although i can't say he actually gets me on that level. maybe he will one day, but right now i am too blinded by infatuation and first love to mind. besides, he and i have not been together that long, and there are a lot of dimensions of this relationship thing to explore. and it's really fucking hard to do that when he's in missouri. (not that i don't fully understand and respect why he is there and what he is doing. i just can't wait for him to get back so that we can pick up where we left off)

the new brand new album, daisy, was leaked. and, after the initial shock, i realized it's pretty good. it's kind of funny because i can hear all three of their previous albums in it, and those three albums were very, very different. it's not as good as the devil and god, but it's good.

and i need to get out of this town. desperately. actually, fuck that, i need to get out of this state. i can't do that right now, for more than one reason. but after a while, i think i'll have to. i'm going stir crazy. of course, i need something to do. i need to get a job, really, but i just haven't buckled down and done it.

one of my best friends found out that her father passed away. it sounds stupid because i didn't really know the man well, but it affected me a lot. and she's in pain, and i don't know how to help her. she helped me out so much when my grandfather died, but the only thing i've been able to do for her is say "i'm here if you need anything at all." and, though i loved my grandfather, it's different with a parent. my father died, but i was so young that i really can't relate to her at all.




and i don't think my music is depressing at all.

10 things i wish i could say to people.
1. what happened?
2. you really, really hurt me.
3. i miss you so much. you just don't even know.
4. i want to be with you for a long, long time. i hope you feel the same way.
5. i will never trust you ever again.
6. you have begun to fail at life. please pick yourself up, for me.
7. i honestly don't care about what you did to me any more, because i am happy in my life now.
8. stop telling me you're in love with me. you disgust me.
9. i feel like i could tell you anything.
10. it doesn't matter that you slept with your best friend. nothing matters at all.

Nine things about myself.
1. i am so tired right now, i could sleep for ages.
2. i hate my freckles.
3. i am in love with a boy who i am afraid is not as serious about me.
4. i am rereading breaking dawn, although i think it's stupid.
5. i need to get a job.
6. i am so pms'd right now.
7. i've been calling my voice mail over and over just to hear him say he loves me. just to hear his voice.
8. i spend way way too much money.
9. all i ever do is drive and listen to music.

Eight ways to win my heart.
1. intelligence
2. physical attractiveness, at least to an extent.
3. they don't have to be as deep as the ocean, but i despise shallow people.
4. honesty. always, even if i don't want to know the truth.
5. physical strength, but that isn't a necessity.
6. emotionally wimpy boys. as in someone who doesn't have their own opinions, but only echoes other peoples'
7. someone who loves the same kind of music i love, or someone who is nerdy in the way i am.
8. don't be afraid to be yourself. i can't get to know you if you're someone else all of the time.

Seven things that cross my mind a lot.
1. waking up in vegas. it's my ringtone and it's CONSTANTLY STUCK IN MY HEAD.
2. nicholas.
3. my friends.
4. god and/or the lack thereof.
5. nicholas.
6. i need a cigarette
7. nicholas.

Six things i do before i go to sleep.
1. wash my face.
2. take out my contacts.
3. wash my feet.
4. plug up my cell phone.
5. take my allergy medicine and get a large glass of drinkage.
6. talk to nicholas. (this was before he left for basic)

Five places that i want to visit.
1. italy. not the touristy parts, but real italy.
2. japan.
3. india.
4. the west coast.
5. the east coast again (it's where my heart and soul is.)

Four things i'm wearing right now.
1. shorts.
2. underwear.
3. shirt.
4. my hair up.

Three bands i listen to often.
1. bright eyes.
2. brand new.
3. any number of bands.

Two things i want to do before i die.
1. go skydiving.
2. be happy and fulfilled.

One confession.
1. he told me what you talked about, and i am still angry over it.




from .

has been drama-filled.

-edited for people who may come across my page-